Gratuitous Dread Presence

Hurls before swine

So last night, I found myself shivering. Tucking under the blankets further, I was surprised to find that I was a bit nautious. Sure enough, after one dry run, I ended up sharing the contents of my stomach with my toilet. I was really glad that I had spent some time cleaning a few days ago.

After returning to bed, I gave my wife a rundown of my symptoms …. And it seems like I have caught a case of H1N1. A few minutes later, we heard my son get up. Because the dog was in the way, he ended up horking over the dog as opposed to the toilet.

So we’re both sick now. Actually, it’s not as bad as the flu I had last year. That one had this way of making you feel better, only to make you pay for it when you exerted yourself later in the afternoon. I ended up missing several days of work. As I am just a temp, it meant days without income for me.

Of course, the temp agency sent me a guideline for calling in sick a few weeks ago. It talked about the importance of not infecting other coworkers, and also reiterated that I was to call in to both my assignment supervisor and the temp agency if I was going to be out sick.

One of my coworkers, who was a regular employee, was complaining about people who were ‘thoughtless’ because they reported to work ill. I had to explain to her that it often wasn’t a matter of choice—and that for many of us, a missed day of work meant no money. She was still a bit defensive about it, even when I pointed out that not working for several days meant that some temps wouldn’t be able to pay rent.

I read in a article a few weeks ago that something like 55 percent of America’s workforce did not have any paid time off for illness. This fact was cited as a possible reason that the H1N1 flu was going to spread so quickly. I think they’re right. Society puts too many demands upon us, and it’s hard to even take a few days for recuperation.

If I don’t feel well on Monday, I won’t be going to work. I’m fortunate enough to be able to still pay my bills, even if I do miss a couple of days of work. I am glad, though, that I’m sick on a weekend, and not a weekday.

Turkeyherding

My assignment was in a high rise building in Schaumburg, and it was my third assignment with that company, though my last two had been in another location. The company had rented a large amount of space in this building and I reported to work in their main reception area, which was on the top floor.  

I was assigned a workstation on the third floor. My department handled international shipments of food products, and I was there to assist with a seasonal shipment. I was the only temp in a department of about 8 people.

The company was in the process of reducing their office space within the building. They occupied about 6 separate floors in the building, but most of the floors consisted of empty workstations. On the floor I worked on, there were approximately 100 unoccupied workstations from people who had been laid off or moved to another location.

My specific workstation was near the door, and clustered with others in my department. I was told that there would be a move to the top floor in a few weeks. My computer was not a recent model. During one of my breaks, I wandered around the unused cubicles, and discovered that virtually all of the computers were on—and had been since the office had been vacated. I looked over a couple, and discovered several that were better then the one I was using. I attempted to log in on a high end workstation, but was unable to do so.

I ended up switching my assigned computer with one that was much better without anyone noticing. I also went around and turned off every unused computer I found—and I was surprised that no one else had thought to do so.My tasks were explained to me by both my supervisor and several coworkers. Mostly they involved preparing shipping documents in several online systems, as well as updating spreadsheets and faxing documents. I was given Office Professional, and transferred several spreadsheets into Access applications for my own personal use. I also designed a Excel application for preparing fax cover sheets, also for my personal use, though my supervisor saw what I had done, and later asked me to design several for her use.

Work was slow at first. I was hired to assist shipping turkeys, which needed to arrive in the weeks preceding thanksgiving. For the first several weeks, I found myself with a lot of idle time, which caused me to quickly resent the assignment.

One day, employees from the corporate IT department went through the floors recovering computers. Several days later the department was moved to the top floor. There I was assigned a more open cubicle, which even had me identified by name. A small lunchroom was nearby, which featured large windows looking east.

The atmosphere in the office was very subdued. The company had a round of layoffs a month or so prior to my assignment and people seemed to be in fear of additional layoffs. Employees were reluctant to appear as anything other then hard working, and everyone wore serious expressions. I noticed an interesting fashion quirk—most of the men were fond of wearing polo type shirts with white crew t-shirts underneath. Several employees wore this combination exclusively.

At one point during my assignment, an employee in another location received one of those ‘Send this email to everyone you know and Bill Gates will give them $200’ emails. This wouldn’t have been a problem except for his desire to help his fellow employees. He kindly forwarded it to the ‘all’ address.

When I came in to work, I was told that email was down due to a virus. I didn’t receive any email until around 3 pm, which was finally the aforementioned Gates email, and associated replies. It took almost three days before email was returned to normal.

Work came in, and I found myself part of a team dedicated to moving turkeys. I participated in several conference calls, and established communications with the shipping agents, as well as the company representatives in the receiving location.  Soon I was shipping several container loads of turkey a day.

I also was shown the company’s new SAP tracking system, an unwieldy monster written in .net, and was trained in making updates. I did make some updates, and worked to expand my knowledge of the system, but was unable to do much work because I was never officially given access. I made an effort to gaining access, even to the extent of meeting with the department head, who told me that I didn’t need it. At that point I realized that they would not offer me a permanent position.

One day the turkeys ran out. It happened during a conference call, and the company employee who was providing me the product was talking about filling a couple of orders, but having to get them from some different lots. Then the leader of the call started questioning what was left—and then said that we had shipped all that we were supposed to.Over the next two weeks I spent watching my turkeys make their way. At one point a hurricane interfered with deliveries, and I had to juggle some paperwork.

As the last shipments were received, I was assigned a variety of smaller tasks. I shifted several files around, and prepared items for storage. Once that was completed, my supervisor told me it was time to go.Since then, the agency that placed me with that company ceased operations.

Joplin, Missouri

I arrived in Joplin at night, after leaving Des Moines, Iowa that morning. I had kept an eye on the weather, and realized that it was going to rain that night, so I squandered some of my hard earned cash on a cheap motel room. My money was well spent; I watched the rain from the balcony.

The next morning, it was clear. I hiked out to the highway, and found that there were two other hitchhikers working the exit. Both of them were vagabonds—adult men who appeared to travel as part of their lifestyle. They were about fifty meters apart, and I hiked to a place beyond them, where a car would see me only after seeing them.

About an hour later, beat up white American car slowed down to take a look at the first vagabond, but then passed him by. The then eyed the next one, and passed him by. They saw me and pulled over. The car was kind of old, pretty dirty, with some trash and stuff in the back seat. One of the things that struck me as odd was the presence of a cheap turntable.

It was a couple that picked me up—A man who appeared to be in his mid or late thirties, and his wife of somewhat similar age. The wife was pretty large, and, as I discovered later, missing one of her legs below the knee. At first, she explained that she had lost it in Vietnam, where she was a nurse, but then later said it was lost due to diabetes.

They were from Arkansas, some small town near the Missouri line. Their language was very heavily accented, and I struggled to grasp the meanings and nuances of their dialect. Through careful listening, I learned that they had come up from their town yesterday, and had spent last night in Joplin, drinking at various bars. They were on their way to Oklahoma City, to visit a relative.

We entered the Oklahoma turnpike system, and made our way west. They asked me if I had any pot, and I lied and told them no. After a while, they pulled over into a rest area on the tollway. At that time, the rest areas of the Oklahoma tollways had full service restaurants. My ride promptly got a table and ordered a hearty breakfast. Once it came, they stirred everything into one big pile on their plates, and dug in.

The restaurant was a classic example of a truck stop, so I casually watched a tractor trailer park outside. The truck driver jumped out and made his way to a bank of pay phones in the back. A woman, accompanied by a four year old girl got out and came into the restaurant. And came to our table.

She then proceeded to shout at my ride. They responded in kind, and I sat there calmly eating my breakfast while the other patrons watched. Their dialect was still heavy, but I was able to ascertain that the woman had come up with them last night to Joplin, and they had gotten separated while out cruising the bars.

After fighting, the calmed down, and the woman and kid joined our table. I wondered if this was going to be a problem with my ride, but they quickly rearranged things to fit the three of us into the back seat. We continued onto Oklahoma City. The girl sat between me and the woman, and I talked to both of them for a while. The woman was vaguely attractive, and she seemed interested in the college life that I was leading, though not questioning why I was out hitchhiking.

I began to play with the girl, and she responded. We began to have fun, and then the woman put a stop to it. I didn't realize then that the woman was upset with the attention I was giving to her daughter instead of her.

I was dropped off in the middle of town, and it took me several hours to get to the right side. I finally did, but not before rejecting a ride from some aggressive looking kids. I finally got a ride from an oil field worker who dropped me off in a small town in western Oklahoma. I spent the night there in a roach invested motel room. I never remembered the name of that town, but I should have, as I ended up spending the most of the next day along the highway trying to get a ride—by far the longest time I had ever waited for a ride.